Quirky dishes of British Cuisine

I wish I could tell you, “Not just because I live here, but English food is amazing! Their cuisine is so unique and authentic, I just can’t get enough!”

However, when it comes to the food culture here, I have one good and one bad news for you.

Good news: Thanks to London’s cosmopolitan vibe, you can find dishes from almost every cuisine imaginable—Thai, Italian, Indian, Japanese, Moroccan, American, Turkish, and more. There are hundreds of restaurants, and most of them are truly delicious.

Bad news: English cuisine? Well… it hardly exists, my friends. There are a handful of dishes the English call their own and somehow take pride in. I’ve tried most of them, and honestly: their tastes can be very peculiar, and some dishes are downright strange! You’ll understand what I mean as you read on. Not that they have much of a reputation worldwide either—according to a recent study, English food was voted the worst cuisine in Europe.

In this post, I’m going to tell you about some of the quirky English dishes I’ve tried so far. To be honest, some aren’t bad—at least, they’re edible. But then there are some… well…

Let me start describing them and you’ll see if you agree with me!

"Afternoon Tea": No milk in my tea, please!

One of the most famous British culinary traditions is, without a doubt, the world-renowned afternoon tea.

Afternoon tea is a true delight (and social affair) where the English, proudly embracing a “royal vibe,” enjoy mini sandwiches, sweets, and scones served on three-tiered stands. Personally, it reminds me of my mom’s “daytime gatherings”: instead of lentil balls, stuffed grape leaves, and spinach pies, here you get a slightly different array of treats.

So, what do the English actually eat at a traditional afternoon tea?

True to their national character, even afternoon tea has a proper order and sequence. On the bottom tier of the three-tiered stand are the savory items, usually cucumber, ham, and butter finger sandwiches.

The middle tier features the English favorite, scones with jam & cream. A scone is like a sweet bun, split in half and spread with butter or cream and jam—delicious. I have to admit, whenever I visit a café on weekends, I can’t resist one myself; afternoon tea is not to be skipped, dear reader.

Finally, the top tier holds sweets or the famous buttery shortbread cookies. This ceremony is accompanied by traditional English tea, served with, of course, a splash of milk.

The whole “milk in tea” thing has been a hot topic for me ever since I moved to England. Some of my English friends would suggest having tea and, without asking me, pour milk into my cup. I won’t lie—it used to make me a bit irritated at first. Now I’m used to it, because I immediately shout, “NO MILK!”

The reason the English add milk to their tea is said to date back to a time when cups weren’t of high enough quality to withstand hot tea. People would pour milk first to warm the cup, then add the tea.

Another theory is that the English learned the milk-and-tea combination from the Chinese and Tibetans during their travels. A friend of mine from India recently mentioned that milk tea has been drunk in India for centuries, and during the colonial period, the English saw it and made it their own tradition.

Which one is actually true, I don’t know—but one thing’s for sure: milk tea has become synonymous with this country, and I still can’t bring myself to drink the combo.

"Full English Breakfast": Joy of eating beans in the morning

A traditional English breakfast typically includes fried eggs, grilled tomatoes, sausages, bacon, and hash browns (grated and fried potatoes).

So far, so normal—but things get a bit quirky with the following dishes:

Beans on toast

The English eat one of my favorite dinner legumes—beans—for breakfast, and they put them on buttered toast. The strange part? These beans are much sweeter than what I’m used to. At first, I thought, “Ugh, what is this?!” but now, if they’re put in front of me, I’ll eat them. Still, it’s not something I’d go out of my way for.

Apparently, the tradition of eating beans for breakfast originated during times of hunger, as a cheap way to fill up. Someone really needs to tell them they now have one of the world’s largest economies—because these beans give the entire nation a serious gas problem. I’m not joking: walking on the street, riding the Tube—everywhere, there’s an unavoidable “emission mode.”

Black Pudding

Don’t be fooled by the name—this “pudding” is not a dessert. Not the sweet kind we usually think of.

Known as blood sausage, this breakfast item is made by boiling pig’s blood, mixing it with oatmeal, stuffing it into casings, and frying it.

It ended up on the breakfast plate for the same reason many traditional English breakfast items exist: from centuries-old hunger times, designed to keep you full.

I first (and last) tried black pudding at breakfast in Edinburgh. Because of its black color, I thought it was some kind of dried sausage or meat. If you don’t know what’s inside, you might keep eating it thinking, “Interesting!” But of course, I gave in to curiosity, Googled it, saw the truth, and then slowly put down my fork and knife. From that day on, I made a mental note: always check online before eating something unknown in this country.

Haggis

Sheep or lamb heart, lungs, and liver are minced, boiled, and mixed with spices, bulgur, raisins, pistachios, and some fat. This mixture is then stuffed into a tripe casing, boiled again, and served.

Even writing these lines makes me queasy! Like black pudding, this was another weird Edinburgh dish I tried without knowing what was inside, fueled by my “I must taste the local cuisine” mindset. Definitely not something I’ll order again—oh Scotland, what did you make me eat!

Marmite:

In England, there’s a breakfast spread that people either love or hate—so much so that its slogan is literally “Love it or hate it”. Can you guess what it’s made from? Beer. Well, more precisely, it’s an extract of brewer’s yeast. True to their love for beer in any form, the English take a slice of toast, spread a little butter, add some Marmite, and start their day like that.

"British Pies": Whatever You’ve Got, Stick It In

When I think of pies, the first thing that comes to mind is usually a sweet apple tart—until I got exposed to the many savory main-course pies (or “pays,” as they sometimes spell it) in this country.

In fact, just the other day, I went to a pub for lunch with my colleagues and, for the first time in my life, I actually said: “I really fancy a steak pie, with some gravy on top.” Then I immediately thought, “Oh my god, they’re getting into my blood—I’m starting to become like them!”

Of course, I happily ate the steak pie anyway.

Anyway, back to the topic—there are so many types of pies, and naturally, some of them are a bit… unusual:

Steak & Kidney Pie:

This pie is filled with sliced steak and liver, and is served with brown gravy, a rich meat sauce. The steak pie is one of the most popular pies in the country—so much so that the Scots make sure to include it in their New Year’s meal.

There’s also a Steak & Ale version, where the steak is cooked with English ale. Ah, the English and their love for beer…

Shephard's Pie or Cottage Pie:

This quirky traditional dish doesn’t actually have any pastry. Minced meat, peas, and carrots are cooked, then topped with mashed potatoes and served.

Historically, it was a common meal for the working class, especially in the 18th century when potatoes became widely available. The word “cottage” in its name comes from that era.

There’s also a variation called Cumberland Pie, where breadcrumbs are used instead of mashed potatoes on top. (Immediately makes me think of Benedict Cumberbatch.... forever obsession of quirky British men)

Fish (Fisherman) Pie:

Like I said, the English will make a pie out of anything! This one is usually made with haddock, shrimp, or salmon, topped with mashed potatoes, and baked in the oven. Of course, there are some weird variations.

Take Stargazy Pie, popular in Cornwall in the southwest of England: sardine heads poking out of the pie, or the version with sweet potato mash on top, creating a rather unusual mix of flavors…

Toad in the hole (Sausage Toad):

İSetting aside the weird name, who thought of taking those giant sausages, putting them in a wet batter with onion juice, and baking it? Instead of regular tart pastry, they used the batter called Yorkshire pudding.

Mince pies:

One of the rare sweet English pies, the mince pie, is misleadingly named—I used to think it had minced meat every time I saw it in a shop. In fact, it’s a raisin-filled tart.

Especially popular during Christmas, this sweet treat is perfect alongside a cup of tea and actually suits our taste buds quite well.

Fish & Chips: Britain’s Beloved Classic

Let me sprinkle in one of the English dishes we actually enjoy.

Crispy fried fish (usually haddock or cod), served with skinny fries—I’d say this is England’s rare gift to world cuisine. It usually comes with mushy peas, which are wonderfully tasty (I almost always ask for extra—imagine my appetite!).

And traditionally, original fish & chips are eaten with vinegar poured on top. Since I don’t like vinegar, I personally skipped it. Keep that in mind—but don’t try to “eat like a local” and douse your fish in vinegar if you’re not a fan!

“And the Others": More Quirky Delights” 

Jellied Eels

No, you didn’t read that wrong—as the name suggests, they actually have a dish called jellied eel, especially popular in East London. The chopped eel is boiled in vinegar, then allowed to set into a jelly-like consistency, and eaten cold.

I haven’t tried it, and I don’t plan to—thanks anyway!

Scotch Eggs

Despite the name, these have nothing to do with Scotland—they’re a purely English traditional pub snack. A hard-boiled egg is wrapped in sausage meat, coated in breadcrumbs, and deep-fried. The word “Scotch” comes from scotched meat, referring to the meat wrapped around the egg.

I haven’t tried them yet, but after watching the late Anthony Bourdain on Netflix say, “Whenever I go to a pub in England, the first thing I crave is a scotch egg,” they instantly jumped to the top of my must-try list.

Deep-fried Mars bar:

Here’s another quirky treat straight from the heart of Scotland!

Who thought, for what reason, that instead of eating a Mars bar normally, “let’s fry this thing”—we don’t know. But since its debut in the ‘90s, it’s been hugely popular and has certainly helped raise cholesterol levels across the country.

I haven’t tried it yet, but maybe I’ll give it a go one day.

Well, here you go - by now, you probably have a good idea of what to eat and what to avoid in England.

Or at the very least, you can casually drop it into conversation like:"Did you know these English people spread beer yeast on their toast? And some pies actually have sardines in them? What a bizarre bunch!" :)

Cheers,

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